happiness and joy!

Now ,it tickles my funny bone, no, not because I have been exempt from this emotion, but because I can see how the same heart that can love someone to excesses can also laugh at the same things at a later point in time! Nor will I be able to honestly say that I am beyond feeling the same emotions again!

Life is beautiful; I know you will agree that what I say is so inane. It gets even more beautiful when someone waltzes into our unsuspecting heart or our path as we walk along. And then we go careening down all the way into heartbreak land. Only, it’s that I believe that we all have such soft landings that we don’t wake up for a while and our slumber continues to lull us in a pink cocoon?

The tick of the wall clock in a silent room that enhances the tingle of anticipation when we are waiting for that special someone? Oh yes, you can even smell the fragrance in the breeze which would blow even otherwise in our daily existence! I mean, love evokes such poignant and intense emotions inside us when we are in love and it feels as if the universe around us echoes only to that.

And I hope this doesn’t happen to any one of you in love, but when we come out of the cloistered walls of this sacred emotion, we feel dizzy – trying to land on our toes with a semblance of sanity. We vow that it was a close call, that it’s not for us, that we have been there, done that….

When every person that you know has experienced love in their own unique way, I guess it is difficult for them to understand what we see in the ones we love. I have always felt that our friends put up with silence and stoicism our love for someone and secretly heave a sigh of relief when it’s over and we are once again on safer terrain! What is it about that special someone that makes our heart blip so crazily? And why does it change when it’s over? Where does the magic go? My friends would give me endless answers that it transforms into domesticity, into building and living a life together? Does it conclude that anyone not in love is not living in domesticity?

I would say that the magic, the fragrant breeze, the splendid sunset are all still there. That doesn’t change, what does, is our thinking. We inherently believe that happiness and joy has to be shared. By extension of this corollary we believe that it can only be done with the people we are in love with?! I did believe too till I discovered the love of silence. It was an alien sensation, quite unlike the chatter in my head, more so when we are in love! Initially I was drawn into this silence against my will and everything in me wanted to run away; it was so strange and discomfiting.

A day came when I stopped running and stood still. It was a sweet moment and more eternal than any ephemeral human emotion. Inside me coursed pure sensations that touched something which till then I had thought to be inside another heart! In course of time I have learnt to accept that emotion as joy. I have learned that joy is inside us, that happiness can be person/ event related but that joy is always there inside. We need to strengthen that by just acknowledging her presence. The outer world crumbles and cracks around us but the inner world stays intact.

I guess this is what the yogis of yore found after a lot of penance and meditation. I would even go so far as to say that the beatific smile on their face is just a realization of this simple truth as they went in search of complex issues and answers?!